Jealous

It was 9 o’clock and I kept looking at my watch to know how it took from your house to mine. I couldn’t wait to be home and cry, so I leaped my steps while I was searching for some sad songs. Yet, it was hard to find one. It was such a shame though for I wanted to cry as soon as I could. Every single story that I listened was on and on hunting me and at the same time it was killing me really badly. I didn’t know that you two had gone so far and been this close. I knew I was jealous, I was in massive jealousy. I couldn’t even think rationally. I began to lose my mind. My chest was really hurt, a soft and dull stab feeling. My eyes were watery and I couldn’t breathe for a while. As I reached home, I sat and I couldn’t help myself and sobbed. I cried like a little kid. “How could I be this jealous since you don’t belong to me, you don’t even feel the same way as I do? You don’t even love me. You hate me when I say I love you". I knew it was wrong but it was not lust and I just wanted to be with you. I just wanted to keep you warm. Remember, I used to be the one who could make you feel comfortable, but now there was someone else who replaced me to do so. I knew I had no right to cry, to be jealous, to be sad and blue.